Dear Diary – Who am I?

Lately I’ve been confronted with the topic of authenticity. Yesterday it was brought up repeatedly at The Simply Stylist Fashion and Beauty Convention. The previous week it was at a panel with Youtube Queen Michelle Phan. The bloggers and panelists keep driving the same point home – that they attributed their success to their authenticity. They developed their brands from a deep understanding of what they stood for. One of my favorite bloggers, Wendy’s Lookbook‘s brand is “The City Girl”. Michelle Phan’s brand is “Your Beauty Best Friend”. This forced me to ask myself the question: Who am I? What is my brand?

I am: Asian American, Fashion Obsessed, Taiwanese, Cat Obsessed, Rock Singer, UCLA Graduate, Recovering Addict, Late Adopter, Introvert

Well…thats really just a list of labels. I’m rigorously honest in my life but I dont feel like I fully know myself. Isn’t getting to know yourself a lifelong journey? How am I to sum up all I am in a one sentence tagline? I do agree with the advice of “being authentic” but I just don’t have the answers today

I got an email the other day on Facebook that said that I was washed up and old and should give it up. That definitely struck a nerve in me. I hadn’t received a hate email in quite some time but back when I had fame in the import scene the hate mail was daily and constant. The hate mail back then detailed how I was ugly and slutty and I should give it up. At that time I was young and had very low self esteem to begin with and those online rants really cut me to my core. Most of the hate mail always ended with the conclusion that I sucked in some way and I should stop trying. That email actually highlighted the fact that I who I am is someone who has always believed in doing my own thing no matter how far it fell outside the norm of accepted behavior. I’ve also never accepted the limitations of what other people liked to set for me. You are never too old, too young, too poor, too uneducated to do anything. I hope that we can teach our next generation to believe the same thing about themselves.